Were you adopted? This is pretty cool

[Big_Dave]

For those of you that were adopted and have thought of looking for / finding your birth mother (or father), but haven't, this story is one of pure coincidence.
Delivery Truck Driver Finds Birth Mom at Cash Register

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Steve Flaig and his recently located birthmother Christine Tallady at Lowe's Grand Rapids, Mich. Flaig, 22, started searching for his mother years ago.

A 22-year-old delivery truck driver searched for his birth mother for years. Little did he know, she was just a few aisles away.

In 1985, Christine Tallady gave up her newborn son for adoption because she said she wasn't ready to be a mother.

More than 20 years later, Steve Flaig began his search, finding his birth mother's name through an open adoption record, according to a report in The Grand Rapids Press.

Click here to read the report in The Grand Rapids Press.

Flaig discovered his birth mother's home address through an Internet search of her name. The search found an address less than a mile from the Lowe's store where he worked.

After telling his boss his birth mother's name, Flaig was stunned to realize it matched the name of the head cashier, it was reported.

Tallady said she hoped her son would want to find her, and often though of him, especially on his birthday.

Until last week, Tallady was Flaig's co-worker. Now she's his long-lost mother.

Over the past two months, "I would walk by her, look at her from a distance, not knowing how to approach her," Flaig told The Grand Rapids Press. "You don't come stocked with information on how to deal with this."

Last week, they met for the first time as mother and son.

"I have a complete family now, all my kids," Tallady said. "It's a perfect time of year. It's the best Christmas present ever."
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,317487,00.html
For those that don't know, I was adopted and have met my birth mother. I currently live about 20 miles from her and do the 'family things' with her and her family.

My wife gave up a little girl for adoption about 6 months before I met her. 4 years ago, we met her at the Mall of America and the past 2 years, her and her husband have came down and spent the weekend with us.

If you wish, I am willing to answer any questions that you may have on this subject.

[Uturn2001]

I am glad that the two were able to hook up, as both apparently wanted to.

At the same time though I feel sorry for those who do not want to meet their birth mother or the child they placed for adoption only to have that person show up on their door step one day.

IMHO all adoption records should be sealed from day one with only an ID number given to the child and mother and then if one wants to locate the other they enter that number into a central registry and if the numbers match then contact information released. If lost the numbers should be able to be obtained by providing certain information like the mother's name at the time of birth (for the birth mother) and the child's adoptive parents name(s).

I have always felt that adoption is a wonderful thing. In many cases it can be seen as an extreme act of love to give up your child because you know s/he would be far better off with a family that can care for and provide everything the child needs when the birth parent can't for whatever reason.

It is a shame though that the ages old institution has been sullied in recent years by the birth mother coming back years later wanting her child back and the sticking courts granting it there by ripping the child from the only Mom and Dad they have ever known.

[Big_Dave]

I agree with you 100% on all the points of view you present.

My brother Jeff and sister Kristi are also both adopted. Though they both can understand my reasoning for meeting my birth mother, they do not wish to contact, nor receive any contact from theirs. I totally respect their decisions.

When I first learned that my birth mother had attempted to find me, I was, to say the least, totally confused. I came home from work one day to find a letter from Lutheran Social Services saying that someone wanted to contact me. Since I knew that I was adopted and had never dealt with LSS in the past, I knew what it was about. My wife and I discussed my options for about a week before we approached my parents and told them what was up.

My Dad was basically pissed off (I can see why), and my Mother, while happy for me, was very wary / apprehensive / concerned about the whole ordeal. The main concern of my parents was that I was going to 'replace them', which was not / nor ever was the case.

It took a couple years of lots of talking to get everything on an even keel. Finally, my folks agreed to meet my birth mother and her husband. At first it was awkward as hell, but it didn't take long for things to smooth out.

Today, while they're not close friends, each asks me about the other (how are they doing type questions), when we talk. My mother sent a nice card and came to the wake last year when my birth mothers husband passed away.

My birth mothers children had mixed views once they learned that I was their 'older brother'. Yes, that's how I was introduced at a family gathering. Talk about awkward! :yikes:

Gene (her oldest son), thought I was trying to take 'his place' as #1 son. It took me a while to break him of that idea, but I did it.

Troy (he could pass for my twin but is a couple years younger), thought it was 'cool'.

Stacy & Mary Helen had no reservations and welcomed me into the family with no problems.

Mark had some minor difficulties, but worked them out in short order.

The name my birth mother gave me was Kevin Ray. She hated names that could be shortened into nicknames. Wonder how she feels about T-Roy? (Troy's nickname) :rofl:

My biological father? I don't know his name, nor will I. My birth mother either won't tell me or she can't tell me his full name. All I know (from what she's told me), is his last name and that he was from Minot ND and he was in the Navy. Once he found out she was pregnant with me, he beat her. :angry:

If I ever meet him, as I shake his hand (gripping it so he can't get away), I'll step on his foot and nail him square in the face with a left hook, giving him the same kind of beating he gave her.

That's all that SOB deserves from me.

[acorn]

I know a woman in WA who was adopted and spent years and who knows how much money trying to find her birth mother. She finally found who it was but by the time she was able to contact her she had passed. She did get to meet with the other siblings and appears to be working on a relationship with them.

IMHO the most important reason for someone to be able to find there birth parents, besides just wanting or needing to, would be for the medical background. It could be valuable to know if there where any genetic illnesses to be concerned with.

[Foxfire]

A very dear friend of mine was adopted and she told me this little thing her Mom always told her. " Other kids get the parents God gives them. You are special because God let us pick you."